An astonishing appearance

On an assay to recuperate from the expiration of the sun

I was looking at the horizon dreaming of impossibility

Nature seemed to be mystic with a lot of hidden facts

It asked me to wait till the next dawn for the impossible

The impossibility of a new life to the sun that expired

Death appeared like a small baby who cries at times

And returns itself with a smile on face within no time

As the thoughts swamped me to the realness of life

Your grin caught my eyes all of a sudden, oh Venus

You smiled from the place of an awful breakup, where

The sun uttered no words while leaving me all alone

Your appearance was like a consolation to recover

Recover from the pain of a horrible separation

Imparting your grimace to my weeping face of sorrow

You stood like the brighter entity of the universe

The sun already had a nice sent off and was not seen

The moon was yet to be seen somewhere around

As the sky grown darker and darker without blemish

You made yourself brighter and brighter

In growing darkness, you appeared like a symbol

A symbol of goodness among the world of badness

As I was about to lose myself on your smile,

A small breeze slowly touched on my face

As if it wants to tell that something is missing

Something that will make me brighter

Brighter than you oh dear Venus

You are my eraser

You erased all my sorrows like an eraser does with pencil marks,

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to erase it

You wiped off all my tears like an eraser does with all hand shifts

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to wipe it off

You effaced all my offenses like an eraser does with all my errors

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to efface it

You unbowed all my disarray like an eraser does with dark lines

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to un bow it

You rubbed out all my gloom like an eraser does with shadows

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to rub it out

You moved out all my lags like an eraser does with drafting hands

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to remove it

You edited all my myths like an erase does with alien draws

No matter though, you had to leave yourself to edit it

My Eraser

Returning me to the reality would have been difficult

If you were not there to erase all of my mistakes

Editing each of my errors would have been arduous

If you were not there to rub out each of them

Deleting all of my faults would have been impossible

If you were not there to remove those flaws

Redemption of my spurted ideas would have been severe

If you were not there to slay those imperfections

Framing of my real sketch would have been laborious

If you were not there to wipe off those pin lines

Casting the best of my imagination would have been hard

If you were not there to wipe out their blemishes

Living a life of uncertainty would have been easier

If you were there to wrap all my misapprehensions

Leading life without you would have been elusive

Like a painter who leads a life without an eraser.

The Dangerous Serenity

A stroll through the banks of the river made me enjoy the bump of a clean breeze over the face. It seemed a very pleasant experience and I could really enjoy my solitude on that leisurely walk as it was one of those rare occasions I got to talk to myself during the busy schedule of my life. Employment with a multinational corporate, demanded a normal person like me to invest a lot more under the pet names of commitment and smart work; nevertheless we never got rewarded adequately for our loyalty and awful distress. As my joy in the stroll was overwhelming, I couldn’t discern ‘whether I am watching a 3D movie or I am in a dream or I live the reality”. As if it wanted to make me confirm the existence of myself to be on earth, a dried up branch of a short plant crimped on my leg. If I was not in an extreme superficial world, I would never have noticed this misbehavior as I would have been in a very busy schedule to guide me ignore such minute sensations, but now, I could make it out with an extreme volatile realization because of my ultimate enjoyment that kept me detached from the realities on earth. 

Returning to the reality, opened a lot of undeniable facts and the most important among them was ”I am walking through the bank of a beautiful river for more than an hour and till now, I didn’t reach my destination where I am supposed to meet my customer whose wisdom will make me achieve my business target of the month”. As she told me over the phone while seeking an appointment, I was supposed to walk only for 20 minutes I walked beyond that for more than an hour. But, no scenic beauty that enticed my eyes for last one hour included a building as she told. As I was very sure of not seeing any buildings on the way through the bank of the river, I decided to ring her again. Though I wanted to reach her phone, I couldn't because my mobile service provider never understood the appealing beauty of this location. Though, I was standing in the calmest and the most charming place I ever saw, a strange fear launched into my heart. The feeling which I named as solitude, now appeared as loneliness and it invariably began to scare me. I raised my voice to see if somebody is around, but adding up my fear I couldn't find the presence of another living being there. Instead, I heard the roaring voices of dogs and foxes somewhere around. My heart suddenly became the port of fear and doubt. Do I need to proceed further or should I go back to office?

The sun was tired and was planning to reduce its heat to a certain level. I checked the time in my watch. It was 4 pm. The option of returning to the office required immediate attention as my boss called an urgent meeting at 5.30 pm to announce the top manager of the month. If I could get this business closed today, I will be that lucky one for the very first time in my career. Though, the intense desire for recognition and the draw of a handsome incentive seemed to be strong motivators, what exactly made me resume my walk was the serene nature that mesmerized me from head to toe. I continued walking without even thinking of my destination. On completion of 20 more minutes in the enchanting beauty of the greenish nature, I saw a small hut and an old man who was enjoying his local cigar. As I could see the first human being in   last two hours, I expected my mobile service provider could be alive here, but in vain. 

Noticing me trying to check the network, the old man smiled at me showing his dark set of teeth and sympathetically told that “Kunje, you will not get mobile network here. You need to walk for half an hour more to reach the village where you can get the mobile network.” I was shocked because I never expected such a place near the heart of the city”.

When I sought help from the old man to find the house of the lady who can rewrite the history of my day, the old man again smiled with empathy and told me “Kunje somebody must have cheated you as nobody lives in this place, it’s a reserved forest. Nobody goes inside the forest alone because poisonous snakes and wild dogs reign there”. I could not believe his words as it was the place in which I found myself. How could the place that gave me a lot of positive energy be the home for poisonous beings? I felt a bit bad of him calling the beings of that ravishing atmosphere poisonous, instead I preferred to call that dangerous name to the woman who cheated me and made me go to a forest alone. After drinking the water, offered by the old man, I planned to return to the place where I started my walk as my driver was waiting there with car.   The old man named my thought “unthoughtful” and guided me to walk towards the village from where I will get a bus to reach the city.

On returning, I saw my counterpart was crowned as the best performer of the month and I was given a lot of abuses for the irresponsible behavior I showed. My boss could not believe my story and it was named as yet another imaginative excuse of an inefficient employee. Even my close friends who do understand me didn't seem to believe my fascinating story. Those who believed me could not understand that how I could be alive even after passing that reserved forest alone. The reactions of all those who know about the place told me one thing evidently; I enjoyed my solitude with the bump of an aromatic breeze and heap of delighting nature in a very dangerous forest where hungry dogs and poisonous snakes await to kill human beings. Tough, I was subject to be scared I never was, on the other hand, I still cherish those moments of solitude and christened it as the most unattainable happiness yet again. All thanks to the lady who misguided me to that place alone. She must have thought of me dying alone inside it, but I am living: living with the memories of that marveling serenity forever.   

The Nostalgic Tamarind

 Nostalgia brings a mix of both sportive as well as staid modalities at a time. This morning was full of life and induced me unfold the closed doors of memories in its depth. The reason was the solicitation sent to the memories by an image that showed the picture of one of the most famous dams, just before it getting filled. Now, it is filled with water and a drought is no longer anticipated, that site could never be probable again. Though this image has nothing to do with my memories, it has brought back another vista to my memory that will never appear in front of my eyes again. It’s a panorama that often came out without any benignity and without considering my inclination to hide it in the invisibility of my mind. It stimulated a sensation that my heart is very delicate, despite my desire for it to have the appearance of a very bold personality.

The scenery was of the big tamarind tree that stood in our courtyard when I was a child. The big tree with small leaves that oscillated in the breeze and tamarind fruits that waited for the arrival of a wind to prove that even we can hover. The hugeness of the tree caused me to have the pleasure of only a long sight of its branches with those beautiful leaves and tamarind fruits. As all my friends were visiting their paternal and maternal houses during the school vacation, I made it a routine to visit the tree in the vehicle of loneliness with the ticket of sorrow given by my mom. I wanted to believe that like me, the tamarind tree also is alone and my presence will make her happy, but I was wrong. The tree had the company of thousands of ants, hundreds of small birds and bats and a big king fisher. With this much of companions around, the tree didn't even look at me and I felt much lonelier.

I kept my efforts to talk to the tree, but she was adamant and never replied. To console my mind, I tried to convince it by saying that the ear of the tree is in its ears, but my mind never seemed convinced. In spite of her ignorance, I never stopped visiting her and in the cooling of her shadow and in the taste of the tamarind fruit that fell down from the tree I often fell asleep beneath the tree. While sleeping, many a times I was aimed by mom’s wrath and was hit by the stick of the tamarind tree to show yet another face of the tamarind tree. To save me from the loneliness and the red-hot climate of the summer, the rains visited me along with my friends. While I was walking towards my friends assisted by the rains, I hid all my dislikes towards the tamarind tree that ignored me for last 60 days.

At last one day, I bid good bye to the slavery named school and bondage named uniform and walked towards the freedom named college and miracle named marriage. On these ecstasies of freedom and miracle, the tamarind tree never visited me even in my dreams and I never thought about her. After a few years, on a regular visit to my parents, when I felt too hot, I asked my mom for the reason and she told me about the dismemberment of the tamarind tree.  While listening to my mom, I could realize the depth of care, taste, nip and consolation given by the tamarind tree. Without uttering even a single word, without hearing anything from my loneliness, the tree was taking care of me. In severe pain, I recognized that I won’t see her again.  Despite my intense desire to see it again, I christened it as an impossible vision and hid its memory wrapping it with the blanket of forgetfulness.

Qamar ul mutha'allim

Nailed up by desolation

I cried out to get freed

I ran towards the mounts

To have a new venture

On the way,it happened,  

I met him!!! the man of hope

He is far from a good teacher

A teacher never be like this

He is the man of blessing

A boon given from heaven

Though,  he means so much

I call him only Usthad,

They call him shamzul ulama, 

The sun of wise men

I call him qamarul mutha'allim, 

The moon of aspiring students.

For them, he shines like sun

But burns with heat of truth

To them he grins like sun

With his light of knowledge

For us, he shines like moon,

With all his  love and compassion

To us, he smiles like moon

With all his purity and reflection

He taught us how to live

When we refused to learn

With him, we forgot how

How we learnt all we ought

I went to learn Arabic

But he taught life along

Thank you so much Usthad

The personified blessings.

The inmate

While going through the application form filled by the young beautiful lady, sitting in front öf her table, Anita's mind was filled with emotions. She couldn't understand how could this world be so mean.  Astonished by the answer given in the visitors colunm, Anita stared at the young woman with anger. It was written none in the visitors colunm.
Sitting on the chair of warden in the most famous old age home of the city, Anita could see  the merciless behaviour of different kinds of People.  Many sons and daughters left their parents here forever after promising that they will pay a visit very soon. Though,  they didn't return,  they maintained the courtesy öf not hurting their elders on face.

Here a daughter or a grand daughter??? Anita couldn't make out the age of the victim whose fate is written in the narrow corridors of this old age home. The woman who sat in front of her must be around thirty or thirty five...From her age, Anita guessed the victim as her grandmother who could be of the age somewhere near seventy or sevent five. Seventy five is not a big age in this home as most inmates here are running on their nineties . Thinking about the age, her eyes flew to the colunm of age. That colunm was empty.

The lady who filled the application left towards the car even before Anita thinks of asking about the inmate's age. Within a few minutes,  she appeared with two big bags and one trolly bag. That was again a surprise to Anita as never in  her career, she saw more than one bag given to the inmates. Two or three sets of clothes and a box filled with medicines were the most common contents of those small bags.

Looking at such a heavy luggage Anita called her back. She was confused on the available space to get all these things accommodated. She couldn't understand the need of this much luggage to a woman aged more than seventy. On her voice, the lady looked back with a lot of questions on her long eyes. Though, they were hidden behind her small spectacles,  Anita could spell each and every questions in that look.

She left the luggages on the corridor and slowly walked towards Anita. Anita couldn't  prevent herself from being harsh towards the lady because of her cruelty towards her mother or grand mother. She said in a rough voice that she can't afford this much of clothes here. The lady seemed calm and answered in a low voice that they are not clothes,  they are books....the only assets I have in this world. I cant leave them.

Suddenly Anita felt that she is making a mistake while raising voice to a woman. She must have been entrusted by her siblings to leave their mother here. So she is not the only one to be blamed. On this thought,  she could relax herself a bit and asked whether they needed a bigger room which will cost an amount of fifty thousands rupees more. The lady replied no. That no added a lot to Anita's anger. She couldn't imagine the suffocation an old woman will have in a small room, among this much of books

Without even showing the politeness to seek permission,  the lady turned herself towards the luggage, Anita stopped her to give the reciept of 2.65 lacs. She explained the details of the Payment. Rs.15000 towards admission fees and Rs.2.5 lacs towards the fixed deposit, 40% of which will be returned on the death of the inmate.

Relatives of the inmate cannot claim the dead body as all the healthy parts of the body will be donated to the needed patients and rest of the body will be given to the medical students for their practical sessions. The lady listened it without any pain or restlessness unlike other People who reached there to leave their unwanted parents. Anita started hating the lady again for her insanity. Her mind tagged the lady as personified cruelty. 

As the lady was about to leave again, Anita again called her from behind and asked her to fill the colunm of age. While the lady was taking the pen to fill that colunm, Anita asked her where is the inmate, she should sign in the register. Returning the application form, the lady forwarded her hands for the register. Being hesitant to give it to her, Anita told her that,"no, it should be signed by the inmate". First time since they met, the lady stared at Anita's eyes and took the register and signed on it without her permission and returned it.  Shocked on her move, Anita looked at the colunm of age at the application form. It was written "32 years".