Am I a Beggar?

“Madam…..I am in trouble…I have no food and shelter …..Will you please be kind enough to provide me food as I didn’t have anything for last three days….”The painful voice brought me back from deep thoughts to utter confusion as I was not sure about the identity of those thoughts….My thoughts were seemed to be fluttering and dancing in the air….This painful voice joined that dancing group and laughed at me as if they are much better than my own prayer.

In that muddiness, I found my hands moving involuntarily inside the bag and searched for a coin….I made sure that the coin is of the least value before giving it to the beggar. I looked at him with a clear expression of indisposition as I was getting late for the shopping. I parked my car in the parking lot and went inside the shopping mall. I was shopping for my seven year old daughter who wanted me to get the dancing doll. Even though, she was thankful to me for all the dolls I gave, she was not ready to compromise with whatever options I had given her. She always reminded me of not getting the dancing doll. Yesterday evening her sweet voice had turned into a tone of warning and instructed me that “Mom, today you must get me the dancing doll” and so, I was hurrying myself to find the dancing doll.

I finally could find the best dancing doll available in the city and made the shop keeper to pack it well and pasted a loving card on the packet. While returning to the car, I saw the same beggar sitting in front of the parking area begging to people. As habituated he repeated the same words to me once again, but stopped it when he could realize that I have already given my share of coins to him. The beggar’s face looked as if he does not know the meaning of the term dignity. As I was really rushing to see the happy face of my daughter, I didn’t even think of taking a second look to the beggar and I drove home.

My daughter was waiting for me at the door, she came running towards me and asked for the doll. I was thrilled to give her the doll as I could see the unlimited amount of happiness and thanks in her eyes. She ran to neighbors’   place and showed her new doll to her friend, my neighbors’ daughter. I was happy to see an immense measure of dignity in her eyes….She is now the proud owner of the dancing doll…..after showing her new doll to the neighbor she again joined me and was holding my hands as if I am her everything. I could see the depth of dependence she has in me.

After completing all the routine work, I fed my daughter and made her sleep. I made sure that she is safe and comfortable before moving to the bed. On the bed I closed my eyes and prayed to God, “God,  …..I am in trouble…Will you please be kind enough to provide me food, shelter, clothes, happiness and a happy and luxurious life  as I cannot earn it for myself….”  After the prayer, I closed my eyes and craved to have a sound sleep, but could not as something was disturbing me…Later in the midnight, I have seen God standing before me with all his mighty powers. His hands were searching in his pocket to find the coin of the least value….I wanted to see my face in a mirror….I could see my face and it seemed like “I don’t know the meaning of the term dignity”. I wanted to ask God, why? why is he searching for the coin of least value…but I could not…..as I found myself shameful while God was rushing as he must get the best gift to someone else….I was shocked to see that……

When I opened my eyes I could see that it was a dream……But that dream was like an eye opener…..I looked at my daughter who was sleeping beside me…..looking at her face, I could understand the reason why God was busy….I then closed my eyes and told him…..Lord, I am sorry…..sorry for everything….sorry for the moments I pained you…..My heart was full of thanks …..I could see a feeling of thanks in my own eyes as I always have seen in my daughter’s eyes….I then told God, “Lord, I love you….” I am your child….I want to be with you….I want to hold your hands forever as my daughter does with me….Then I got blessed with a sound sleep….A sleep without any disturbance, which I lost many years back……..My sound sleep was like a statement that states "I am not a beggar"

I am not able to remember when you smiled last

Dad, you became very old in a short time….

Not able to remember, when I met you last time

Dad, you made me realize the pain of love today

Not able to remember when you smiled at me the last

Dad, I don’t know to explain the depth of hurt I gave

Not able to remember the moment you enjoyed life

Dad, you marked pain on my heart when I saw you today

Not able to remember an event when I look at your eyes

Dad, it was really hurting to see you bed-ridden like this

Not able to remember your anxiety I shared last time

Dad, you gave your life and youth for my well being

Not able to remember even a day you slept without pain

Dad, I admire the man who spent life and youth for his father

Not able to remember a single day where you lived for 'you'

Dad, My heart desires to share my health and youth with you

Not able to remember when I made you smile for the last time

Dad, today I want to say something without constraints at heart

Not able to conceal it any more as I know the pain of guilt

Dad, today I did realize that I can’t hide my love to you

Not able to remember when I told ‘I love you Dad’

Dad, today a great realization of love touched my heart

Not able to remember a moment I said, “I made a mistake”

Dad, today I make out that how important are you for me

Not able to remember the time I said, “I am sorry Dad…”

Will my balance life be a balanced life?

‘The alchemist’ that reads "When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it” is the most popular book in the last century. This book helped the author to become the most translated author of the century. From this, we can assess the significance the current world gives, to its dreams. Yes, dreams, goals, destinations and targets are the most repeated words in today’s world. I became an ardent reader of this book and a big fan of its author from the very first time I read this book. I cannot count the number of times I completed reading this book. Each time I went through it, I had a new insight which made me read it again. The Alchemist always gave me a feeling of motivation. But today, after several readings, when I was again searching for a new insight from the same book, I had a new and different insight, which was really shocking. My insight was just opposite to the demonstrated idea of the book…. The book’s title describes it as a fable about 'following dreams'. But, can U believe, today the book made my mind not to follow my dreams…instead you need to analyze your dreams....as it could be guiding or misguiding.

Whoever read this book at least once in their life time may be confused…you may be questioning me by asking how? And what made me say this? My answer is clear…To explain my answer; I would like to draw your attention to this fable. Santiago was a happy and content man as a shepherd. He was acquiring knowledge both from books as well as nature by being a shepherd. He could make people listen him even after being a shepherd. Even his life at the seminary could not get him such a grant life. He became happy when he could be content. His content life made him confident and smart enough to understand the black coins and he always emerged as a winner and could even communicate well with animals.

The introduction of King of Salem was really dramatic in Santiago’s life. The king charged a very high price for an unproven statement and two stones Urim and Thummim. Both the stones could answer only objective questions…don’t U feel It as a head and tail play? I do…By trusting an unknown person, Santiago sells his flock…One and only advantage Santiago had by selling his sheep was the ship ticket to Africa…the rest of his money has been stolen by an African…If King of Salem was Omni potent, he could have instructed Santiago about the possible theft in Africa…As he has not done it…we need to be suspect about the ability of the King….The man never became a help to Santiago after that….Here Santiago lost all his money by listening to a stranger…That stranger could be the brain of the theft…we don’t know the fact?

 You may find my argument a bit odd as you have never even heard even a single word against this book…but we need to have an open heart to reality…Imagine if Santiago could earn more money and travel experience as a shepherd, he would not have sold his flock…he could have invested his savings to some other place and set for a travel….then he would never have such a big tension and helplessness in life. The King compelled Santiago to take a haste decision which again directs all doubts of the king being the possible theft planner. As per my opinion, one needs to think at least once if not two before taking a very important decision. One should know his potential before taking any future step.

Here, Santiago was in haste and so he had to suffer a very bad time in Africa. To get that experience to reach in the pyramids, he had to get a training in the glass shop…that gave him a bit of experience…but Santiago with a proper planning could get a more comfortable travel towards Egypt. The English man was a planned traveler…He could travel till the oasis as Santiago…The story misguides the reader by saying that the man who plans and educates himself like the British man will never emerge as the winner and the man who was very haste in taking his decision and who even lost his chance to educate himself in a land of a very different language was being pictured as the winner. I don’t know how can we believe in such things? These tribal wars and man becoming a wind etc are quite dramatic…just to insert drama in the story…The truth is that Santiago has suffered a lot….He wasted a lot of time and money to reach the pyramids and not to his treasure. He could have made a more comfortable travel if it was planned.

All of us know that, the composition of Gold atom cannot be attained in any other way…It is true that Africa is a big source of Gold…but Alchemy is not a science at all and we cannot transform any other metals to Gold. If he was a real intellect, the Alchemist must be knowing this truth…and thus he helped Santiago to the pyramids to get his treasure…if the alchemist could make Gold, he could have given that idea to Santiago, his newly found disciple…but no….instead he helped Santiago to reach the pyramids....In other words, he was not sure about the truth and he risked Santiago's life. Even after knowing the truth, this old and cunning man misguided the research work of the British man. So...the well prepared and well planned man again made a fool....

By following his dream, Santiago reached the pyramids…Against his expectation, he was being penalized there and he got nothing even after travelling a lot…and I am sure as his travel was disturbed by the thought of his dream, he could not have enjoyed his travel. The only thing he got was Fatima….the girl of the desert….This long and tedious travel could only make Santiago to marry a tribal girl, who will suffer the rest of her life in another continent where she has to compromise with different life style and culture….Santiago’s treasure was really hidden in the ruined church of his own land…That is another shocking news….If staying back at home…with repeated visits to the church with his flock, one day Santiago could have found his treasure without unnecessary tension and sufferings…If not also, he would have blessed with his dream girl, the daughter of the merchant. So, Can we say that Santiago's life was a balanced one….Don’t you think that this book is another tool to mislead our life and future. …ask ourselves… Will my balance life is a balanced life? Let not anything to misdirect us….

Achieve success in life

We live in a world where we are being taught that dreams are the great driving forces that take our life ahead. In fact, this is a great reality to an extent but we need to be realistic when we dream as the proposers of dream theory do not impart any restriction to dream. This can lead us to fantasy dreams, for example all of us know that we cannot fly like birds even though we do dream it intensely. Thus, we need to drive our driving force in the right direction to gain success in life. Here are a few suggestions to achieve success in life.

As mentioned above we need to realize our dreams in all the sectors of our life. Make sure that your dreams are diversified in all the sectors such as career, beauty, relationships, family’s future etc. Once you are finalized with your dreams, try to identify the causes that pull you from materializing your dreams. If you can identify it in a better way, the chances of you reaching your dream destination are more. The next step to success is fixing deadlines for the realization of your dreams. While dreaming you can have short term goals, midterm goals and long term goals according to the extent of deadlines. While fixing deadlines, be aggressive and reasonable.  Always make up your mind with a positive attitude and whisper yourself that you can achieve success in realizing your dream. Famous novelist Paulo Coelho made it clear in his most famous novel Alchemist by writing “……When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” You can depend on various energy sources to maintain that positive attitude in you. The energy source could be your God, a good friend, your parents or even your God father. Such an energy source can work as a support source in problems.

Being positive is a basic requirement to achieve success in life and maintaining positive thoughts is a great caliber. You don’t need to worry if you feel that you are lacking that quality as it can be developed with practice. Always find only positive sides from others and ignore the negative sides of people around you. Never say or think negative about negative words or images. Always maintain a considerable distance with people who spread negative energy. Remember, the presence of positive people around you brings considerable positivity in you. Try to find the God’s will in your pain rather than blaming God and think twice before you deliver a negative comment about someone. If the situation demands your comment, make it in a softer way. Don’t forget that negative comments are potential weapons to destroy someone’s life. Be tolerant as the reactions on intolerance raise the adrenaline level in human body which is not good for heath. Always try to be calm and never get addicted to pressure. When you are in tension close your eyes and remember the face of your life partner or the person you love most.

Motivate people with positive strokes as appreciation is a good tool for relationship building. It adds a lot of value to both the speaker and listener.  It increases the chemical level of herritonin and oxitoxin in human brain so never leave an opportunity to appreciate others. Start your day with a good morning wish to God and sleep with a good night God. Think of a day where you start your day with smile to God and continuing it with a smile at office and you go to bed at night with the same smile on your lips. 

Who is he, whom I miss a lot?

Oh God, I am helpless…helpless in a way that

I found myself sitting lonely on the river bank

The currents were seemed to be concerned

Concerned currents queried about my pain

I told in docile voice that I miss him a lot

Oh God, I am helpless…helpless in a way that

I found myself walking across the paddy fields

On the way, I met the wind who was worried

I could see a deep pause in wind’s passing sound

I consoled wind by telling that I miss him a lot

Oh God, I am helpless…helpless in a way that

I didn’t find it worthy to go out and enjoy nature

I preferred to stay inside the four walls of my home

I myself was confused, what made me sit inside like this

My answer to me was so clear that miss him a lot

Oh God, I am helpless…helpless in a way that

I found myself facing a lot of questions from others

From the water currents, wind and my own soul

The question was same…who is he whom I miss….

My answer is clear…it is him….My love and life

I am proud of you

I am here to let that I am proud of you

Nothing in the world can beat you

I feel words find it hard to praise you

They are on their limits to reach you

You are a man of stronger volition

People envy me because of you

You went through every adversity

Yet, you could stand out of all of it

I am happy that you are mine

I really am proud of your endeavor

I am proud you could make out but…

Aabove all I am very much proud of..

Proud of ... for being you, you, my man

I can’t proceed without saying that

You mad me proud and as you are

You are a cause of my pride and now…

Now I want to tell you that I love you

I want to tell you that how much I love you

Renaissance

Behind the bars, beneath the tree, I saw a standing ovation

An ovation that made me proud, that could prove me myself

Now I know, I am not a zero, I am not bad and I deserve life

Now, I am sure, life has kept something great in hold for me,  

Still, someone inside me asked who am I? and why am I?

A definition is given to each and every entity in this world

There must be one for me as well….I am in search and search

My search ends in the answer who am I? and why am I?

Oh...wind, oh…..earth, oh plants….oh….ocean…listen me

I am confused whether you can listen me? I need know

I need know whether you realize my pain…..yet, I feel…

I feel like asking you the reason behind my being on earth

Wind was kind enough to give a cool hug to my hot heart

Earth with green plants was generous to smile at me in grace

Ocean was deeper enough to understand my notions

Their heartfelt prayer opened new way that made me everything

Now I know, I am not confused about the bars in front of me
Now, I know the reason for the cool touch given by the tree
Hey, tree I am not afraid, I will never be afraid because I know…
I know that you will be beside to comfort even behind bars